Super Rich Oreo Chocolate Peanut Butter Explosion Ice Cream Pie

My friend Sarah hosted a get-together this weekend to celebrate fall birthdays (since both she and her fiance have one) and she emailed me earlier this week to ask me where I recommended she get an ice cream cake.  She thought I might be an authority on the topic! Imagine that!

I immediately knew what I had to do:  I had to make a variation on the ice cream cake my mom always made (at my request) growing up.  She got it from my elementary school cookbook back in the day. It involved an oreo crust, a layer of homemade fudge, a layer of ice cream and cool whip topping. This thing absolutely embarrasses any store bought ice cream cake. And seriously Coldstone has a pretty great one. But I brought it to a whole new level and I couldn't not share it on here. 

First of all I had to make it gluten free since Sarah's fiance Peter, one of the birthday honorees, can't eat gluten. That was a super easy modification for this recipe, I just needed gluten-free Oreos for the crust. I bought a pack each of K-toos and Mi-del's and I used all 35 cookies (leaving one for a garnish on top). You definitely could not tell the difference from regular Oreos!

The second, very important edit was to make this a chocolate peanut butter cake. The ice cream I chose to use is one of my all time favorites, UDF Homemade Brand's Peanut butter & chip. And I added a layer of peanut butter to the cake.  CLUTCH I TELL YOU. I am obsessed with Smucker's Creamy Natural Peanut Butter. I don't know how they do it but it's the best peanut butter for real.

The third edit was the cool whip, which had to go.  I hate that stuff... so gross and fake and horrible for you. I made real whipped cream from scratch instead with heavy whipping cream.

I found a recipe for the fudge layer at Pinch of Yum using Pinterest since I couldn't get the original recipe from my mom in time.

Here goes. I am calling my version:

Oreo Chocolate Peanut Butter Explosion Ice Cream Pie

Crust:
 35 oreos (or gluten free version)
1.5 stick butter
Crush the oreos, melt the butter, mix together and spread in bottom of 9.75x14.75x2 dish. 35 yields a nice super thick crust.  You could use fewer for less crust.

Fudge:
1.5 (ish) cups of chocolate chips
1 stick butter
1 can evaporated milk
2 cups powdered sugar
combine in saucepan, bring to boil and stir continuously while it boils for 8 minutes, then let cool before layering over crust.

 Peanut Butter:
majority of a jar of Smuckers natural creamy peanut butter

Ice cream of choice. 
My choice:  3 pints of Homemade brand Peanut Butter & Chip, softened just enough to spread
4 pints would have been better but my 9.75x14.75x2 dish would have overflowed! A deeper dish would be perfect.

Whipped cream:
carton of heavy whipping cream
1/4 cup (ish) powdered sugar
splash of vanilla extract
whip together using hand mixer (preferably in an ice cold bowl using ice cold beaters) on increasingly high speed until it forms stiff peaks.

Toppings: go wild, get creative! I used rainbow sprinkles, birthday cake M&Ms, mini chocolate chips, a Reeses cup and an Oreo to make it festive and birthday-ish. You could use any sort of candy or decorations that strike your fancy!  The plain white whipped cream top layer is a perfect canvas for any theme or inspiration.

 I made this in 3 stages. The first night I made the oreo crust and refrigerated it in the glass dish, and made the whipped cream. The second night I made the fudge and added it as well as the peanut butter layer over the crust and refrigerated it, and the morning of the party I softened and added the ice cream, whipped cream and toppings to then be frozen. This worked out great.  But you could certainly do all of it at once if you have time, it just needs to freeze together for several hours before serving.

I can't even explain to you how good this is.  If you are a chocolate, peanut butter, ice cream and oreo lover like I am... this is dessert nirvana. It is SO rich. This recipe will feed a LOT of people, at least 20 depending on how huge of slices they want. Maybe not 20 NFL players.

But... go ahead and make it.  If you dare. I can't promise you won't eat piece after piece like me, and when you find someone else's abandoned piece at the end of the night that you won't also eat that, like I did. It's that good. And I am that shameless. OCPBEICP (Oreo Chocolate Peanut Butter Explosion Ice Cream Pie) for the win.

First Words

This is the most exciting time in a mom's life.  Well. So far.  For me. My daughter will be 17 months old this Friday.  What's so exciting at 17 months? WORDS. Communication. Talking!!!

There is absolutely nothing like hearing real actual words come out of your baby's mouth.  It is the cutest and most miraculous sound in the world. It starts gradually and it's hard to put your finger on the exact moment it starts.  For Valerie, it started with animal sounds. Specifically, moo. The first thing she ever said that meant something was while looking at pictures of cows, toy cows and her stuffed cow.  It was a really energetic shout when you asked her what a cow says: "Boooooooo!"

I'm not counting moo as her first word though since I'm not sure it's technically a word. Looking back, I am going to say that Valerie's first real word was bye-bye, although I wasn't there the first time she said it.  We heard from her teachers at school one day that she had said bye-bye to one of them. It wasn't long before we heard it for ourselves! After over a year of babbling and nonsense syllables... to get a real word response was so amazing. Even just to have a word parroted back to you for the first time! Amazing.

I started writing down the words she knew as I figured them out to get an idea of how many there were. There were maybe 10 animal sounds, 10 real words and 5-10 signs when I first started keeping track. She likes signing a lot.  She uses the signs for baby, mama, daddy, dog, eat, more, ball, milk, please and flower all the time. She can say baby, mama, daddy, and ball as well, but she doesn't say eat, more, milk, please or flower yet.  Kind of interesting. I'm not exactly sure why some of the words and signs go together so easily and others she only signs.

It's absolutely fascinating to watch her learn at this age. Every day is some new discovery, for her and for us as her parents. It's a means for her personality to emerge, bit by bit, like seeing the light come on inside. When she wakes up in the morning, sometimes she will recite some of her words.  "Mama, daddy, huff-huff (dog), all done!"

She LOVES babies and dogs. We do not have either in our house (besides her) but she goes bananas whenever she sees one. Dogs she prefers in theory or at a distance. When they come very close sometimes they are a little scary, although she warms up over time. Babies are another story. She loves to grab and kiss babies repeatedly if given the opportunity. She likes kids her age and older, too, but her favorites are the littlest babies.  She vigorously makes the sign for baby, rocking her arms back and forth, and has gotten pretty good at saying "beebee." It started out as "ba" at first, then baba, and now beebee.

One of her funniest quirks is cat.  According to Valerie, instead of meow, cats say "aieee!" We keep teaching meow and at some point she will learn to say meow but I hope it doesn't happen too soon. It cracks me up when she chases my mom's cat saying "aieeee!"

Apple was a fun one the first time she said it. I was feeding her applesauce at dinner and said, "Ap-ple," very deliberately. And she said it back! "Ap-ple."  It was the first time I ever heard her repeat back a word to me so purposefully. I teared up I was so surprised and excited.

She finally, FINALLY learned my favorite word in the past few weeks.  The most beautiful word there is to come out of your baby's mouth: "Mama." Now it's one of her favorites.  When she comes home from school she says mama, mama, mama, mama until she finds me. Then she quickly moves on to gagoo (cracker), gagoo, gagoo, gagoo..... as in, get me a snack mama. Mama is still pretty much chopped liver.  But I will take it! It felt like so long I waited for her to say that one. I still fill up with sunshine every time she says it.

This morning when I was getting her ready for school she was being so sweet, her usual sunny morning self. She was laying on her changing pad and I sang her a good morning song and kicked her legs around to the beat.  She loved it.  She gave me a huge smile and a reverent, "Mommm-myyyy."
 I could not stop smiling all day, thinking of that sweet smile and that "mommmmyyy."  She ADORED her mama in that moment. I could have cried.

These are the days, friends. These are the days of our lives. These are the moments to remember.

Food babe's kale salad and avocado toast!

My dad is staying with us for a few weeks this spring since Rich is traveling a lot for work right now.  We absolutely love having him. It makes the work travel so much less excruciating for me, the parent left behind. And regardless of whether Rich is gone or home it's awesome to have the extra help. Every time he comes to stay I feel beyond spoiled.

It's also nice to have someone to eat dinner with besides my toddler (and it's not like I eat with her anyway. I need both hands free to corral that situation). It means I may actually on occasion have a real dinner as opposed to crackers and hummus or whatever Valerie didn't finish off her tray.

Tonight was an especially good one.  I have to credit one of my favorite bloggers/facebook pages, Food babe, for inspiring this dinner.  This morning she shared on facebook her breakfast of avocado, dijon mustard and black pepper on toast. I already knew I LOVE avocado on toast, and I love avocado with dijon mustard, but this exact combination I had not yet tried. I sometimes have a grilled avocado and cheese sandwich with butter, but after trying avocado on toast with just mustard and pepper, WOW, no butter needed. My toast was rye toast. And just wow, the combination of the creamy avocado, the rye toast crunch, the zesty mustard and the spice of the pepper... here is how you know it's GOOD: my dad claims to hate avocado, but he took a bite, and was converted.

"Wow... that avocado is really good with the dijon mustard..." "this is pretty tasty!"  He ate the whole slice. I was amazed. This is a man who claims guacamole is nauseating.

There are a lot of foods my dad and I can't agree on. Meat - he loves. Cooked vegetables - he hates. Tofu - out of the question. But one thing we can agree on is kale. And last week I saw Food Babe had a recipe for melt-in-your-mouth kale salad. It looked pretty simple and I knew we had to try it. The key is using a food processor to chop the kale into tiny pieces.  If you've ever eaten a non-finely-chopped kale salad, you know why. That stuff takes some serious chewing. The food processor takes the work out and helps make even more of the amazing nutrients in kale available for digestion. Win-win!

The dressing is so simple - olive oil, lemon juice and honey.  I never think to put honey in my salad dressing but I am going to so much more from now on. You would not believe how sweet and delicious it is. I don't really love the flavor of honey by itself, but in dressing... YES.

Food babe calls for currants but I chopped up some dried cranberries instead since I had some handy.

The salad was pretty quick and easy to throw together. I already had some leftover grated parmigiano and toasted pine nuts since I made pesto the other day so it worked out perfectly. And it looks so pretty and vibrant green when you toss it all together! I can't wait to make this salad for guests the next time we have some. It is going in the staple file. We just about licked the bowl clean!

Superfood salad with garlic-ginger-lime shrimp!

Sometimes I am so proud of myself in the kitchen.  These times are few and far between because "dinner" is usually leftovers or hummus and crackers or, let's be honest, it's ice cream.

But tonight I actually made dinner and it was a GOOD one so I had to share! Here is the "recipe." Keep in mind I made this up with what I had in the kitchen and I didn't measure.  I will make some best guesses. But feel free to modify and use whatever you have fresh in your kitchen!

Superfood salad with garlic-ginger-lime shrimp! serves 2

1 box power greens (baby kale, spinach, chard and mizuna) (organic)
handful of grape tomatoes, halved (organic)
1 carrot, shredded (organic)
1/2 cup parsley, roughly chopped (organic)
green onion, chopped (organic)
4 fingerling potatoes (organic)
walnuts, toasted
feta cheese
1/4-1/2 cup olive oil (total guess... I really don't know how much olive oil)
1/2 lime
1/8 lemon
1 clove garlic
fresh ginger
18 cocktail shrimp (precooked)(or buy raw and cook it)
for the potatoes: rosemary, basil, oregano, garlic powder, olive oil

soooo pretty!!!!

for the dressing: pour olive oil and the juice of half a lime and a little lemon into a bowl. chop up the clove of garlic and grate some ginger into the mixture. let the shrimp marinate in this while you make the salad.

chop the potatoes into small wedges (the smaller the pieces, the faster they cook). pour olive oil over them and add the herbs and mix til coated. bake at 415F for about 25-30 minutes or until they are getting crispy and brown outside and flip halfway through.

toast the walnuts on a baking sheet until they begin to darken (but not burn!!).

divide the greens between 2 large plates. chop the tomatoes, grate the carrot, chop the green onion and parsley, and arrange over the greens. add the walnuts, feta, and the potatoes when done. then arrange the shrimp on top (a nice circle in the middle looks fancy!) and pour the rest of the dressing over it all.

If you have a whiny, hungry, crabby toddler clinging to your legs and crying to be held the entire time you're making this salad, ply her with shrimp.  This worked for me.  I hope your toddler also loves shrimp.

This tasted SO fresh and light and healthy and I LOVE the tangy grated ginger and citrus dressing. Nothing compares to homemade dressing. I will definitely have a post on making dressing coming soon.

It's also best enjoyed after the baby goes to bed when you can really focus on the flavors. Pay no attention to the socks, shoes, magnets, toys, and coats all over the kitchen floor, but do try not to trip over them. And do not forget a beverage. I had a tasty Warsteiner beer to complement this beautiful green plate of delightfulness and I was totally satisfied.  Bon appetite!

A Salute to Single Parents and People with a Long Commute

Single parents of the world, if I could give all of you a two week vacation to a tropical island resort, I would, because you deserve a break.  I am fortunate enough to have a wonderful husband to share the work of parenting with and I still yearn for a tropical vacation approximately 27-28 times an hour on any given day (quadruple that in the winter).

I have extra appreciation for single parents this week because Rich had to go out of town for work for 5 days and I am on day 4 of "single momming it." It's actually gone pretty well. I am managing just fine.
I've even enjoyed my time with Valerie more than I expected this week.  We've had some sweet morning snuggles and some fun moments that probably wouldn't have happened if dad was here.

But she is also entering a SUPER fun phase of being SUPER whiny and clingy. When we're home she wants to be held all the time and will loudly whine and carry on if she's not being properly catered to. And her demands can be challenging to meet if one needs to, say, make dinner, or take off one's coat.

We get home around 6-6:30 every evening and she's already starving for dinner, so I immediately try to distract her so I can quickly heat up/cut up some dinner for her. Meanwhile she's whining and moaning at my feet to pick her up and take her over to the fridge so she can point to the pictures of babies on the fridge.  Her demands are really pretty simple.  "I don't know why you can't just stop what you're doing and help me look at my baby friends on the fridge Mom! and by the way I'M STARVING WHERE IS MY DINNER WOMAN!?!?"

Then, there's dinner, which I have to admit is getting faster and better every day. Two words that usually describe her eating dinner are slow and messy. But she is actually improving in both these areas. The past two nights she's eaten really good dinners, not taken forever, and not thrown excessive handfuls of food on the floor. So, fantastic progress there.

Evenings can be a bear and they are a lot less fun by myself than with Rich's help.  When we're both home, we take turns picking her up from school (and enduring the sometimes fussy/trafficky drive home), and then one of us can play with her while the other gets dinner ready and we can coach her through dinner together, and then one of us can put her to bed while the other cleans up.

Alone, I get to leave work, drive to her school, pick her up and try to entertain her while battling traffic, make dinner, listen to whining, watch her eat, put her to bed and then clean up. Thank god she's asleep by 7:30-8 because that is an exhausting two hours after a full day of work.

Mornings are not so bad. She's pretty cheerful and cute in the morning (once she gets her bottle!!!  It's like the toddler equivalent of coffee.  DO NOT talk to her til she's sucked down 8 oz of milk in one go).

The worst part about single mom mornings is the extra driving.  Rich usually does the morning daycare drop-off because it's close to his work. It's completely out of the way for me. We live 7 minutes away from my work, but when I have to drop her off first, it takes closer to 30-40 minutes.  And I really, really hate driving in traffic.

Here I will admit that I am terribly spoiled by my 7 minute commute.  It's the BEST FRICKIN THING EVER. It makes me crabby to have to spend 80 minutes of my day driving rather than 14. I realize some people have far longer commutes than this.  Like one or even two hours each way.  I would recommend dramatic life changes for those people... if it were me.  I could not cope with such a long commute every day. Way too much time lost. If it's a driving commute, that is.  A bus or train commute where you can take a nap, work or surf the web is a different animal. That's not so bad.  But driving for more than an hour a day every day would seriously downgrade my standard happiness quotient.

So, single parents and people with long commutes...and, lord have mercy, people who are both(!!!!)... I salute you, brave citizens. I have nearly survived my 5 days of single parenting and extra driving and I can't wait to get back into my spoiled working mom routine where I have tons of help. Hopefully this experience will help me to properly appreciate how easy I have it.

It's a good life. Reading back through this, it sounds like a pretty dreary daily routine, but I honestly feel like I have it all. Family and work and friends and great health... My daughter is healthy and growing and turning into an awesome little person.  It's a lot of work, but she also brings us so much joy. I get to spend my days with people I love and people I laugh with and pretty soon there will be drinking on patios too.  It doesn't get any better than that!

I wouldn't keep you little

A lot of parents say they wish they could keep their babies little forever.  I'm not one of those parents. While I adore my now-14-month-old "little baby" who's quickly toddling her way to toddler status, I never for a moment wish to go back to when she was a tiny, inert lump, which newborns are.

Don't get me wrong, she was a cute lump, but honestly there is nothing about that stage that I miss. She didn't smile for the first time until she was about 12 weeks old and it was a LOOOOOONG 12 weeks waiting for that smile. When you put so much time, blood, sweat and milk into caring for a completely helpless human, the least you want in return is a little love and they can't give it yet.

People who say they wish they could keep their babies little are probably referring to the smiling, sitting-up stage around 5-8 months. Babies definitely get cuter around this age as they fatten up and lose their smushed alien newborn look. But I wouldn't go back to this stage either, cute as it was. Valerie wanted to go places and reach for things but she couldn't crawl yet. It was frustrating for her to wiggle on her hands and knees trying and failing to get anywhere. And of course she still really could not communicate at all except by crying or smiling.

Each age for me has been more fun than the last. Every tiny step toward personhood is a victory. Every new development lets a baby show you her personality, her love, her curiosity; every gain in physical strength lets her explore and discover the world around her and you begin to see who she will be. This is so much greater to me than an adorable but impenetrable creature who is impossible to interact with.

Every day my struggle is to enjoy her as she is now and not wish away the day, hoping that tomorrow will be the day she finally says "mama" or uses a spoon to eat. Every time she makes the next big leap in development there's another one right behind it that she can't do yet.

She is new to walking and getting steadier every day and I can't lie, seeing her walk on her own feet fills me with joy every time. And not just because she's so hilariously and adorably wobbly.

I can't imagine seeing her toddling around the backyard pointing at everything she sees and wishing she was a tiny baby again.  Nothing is more thrilling than seeing her grow into an upright, capable person.

I sing songs to Valerie all the time now. Her eyes absolutely light up whenever she hears one of her favorite songs. Keep in mind I can't carry a tune to save my life. I'm still trying to learn the words to the animal sounds song even though I've heard it about a million times (that one is her absolute favorite). But she loves it when I sing and smiles and claps for more. I'm sure she will soon be demanding that I never sing again and I don't want to be singing the ABCs 10 times a day forever, but tonight I was trying to remember the words to "Baby Beluga" and "Down by the Bay" on the way home and actually really enjoying myself.  Anyone having a rough day should try singing their favorite kid's song to a toddler who listens, entranced. One of those mom moments you never anticipated loving, but there it is.

Today was a pretty successful one in the ongoing struggle to enjoy the moment. It is getting easier. All I have to do is ask, "what does a chicken say?"  and the tiny answer, "cuck cuck," climbs inside my heart and fills it to the brim til I can't imagine loving her any more. 

This is my experience of being a mom so far: getting to watch this brand new person meet herself as she gradually becomes aware that she exists. I have no idea what tomorrow holds but my little girl will be a little older, a little stronger, and a little more aware than she was today, and I will be there to see it.

I have an image of her in my mind, wearing a backpack, her hair in pigtails, getting on the school bus by herself. Off to school she goes!  I love to imagine her like this, old enough to tell me about her day, ask questions, surprise me and make me laugh with the things she says.

I know that day is coming faster than I realize and I can hardly wait.

My birth story

Here the blog takes a more personal turn from the recipes and creative topics that came before today. I've been wanting to record my birth story ever since I've had a birth story to share and now going on 14 months since I gave birth, I'm finally getting around to it.

I came to love hearing other women's birth experiences when I was pregnant.  They are all unique and so personal. And giving birth is so intense it's hard to convey what it's really like to others.  I'm sure there is a lot I've forgotten in the 14 months that have passed but I will try to remember as well as I can. Get comfy because this story pretty much goes on forever.

In the first trimester of pregnancy, in the throes of 24/7 nausea, giving birth was not remotely on my radar. It was in the second trimester, when my belly started to grow big and round, that it started to dawn on me that this baby was going to eventually need to escape and I better give that some consideration. I took my usual approach and reserved a selection of books from the library to read on the topic. Some of the books I read were:

1. HypnoBirthing:The Mongan Method: A natural approach to a safe, easier, more comfortable birthing
2. Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering: A Doctor's Guide to Natural Childbirth and Gentle Early Parenting Choices
3. Your Best Birth: Know All Your Options, Discover the Natural Choices, and Take Back the Birth Experience
4. Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds

You have probably by now picked up on my crunchiness and desire to have a natural birth.
If you want to read about saving the placenta in a velvet bag until it falls off naturally and breastfeeding until the child is 7, check out the second book - WHEW that one promotes some seriously alternative, some might say "fringe," parenting choices. No judging here. (!)

I heard so many birth stories during my pregnancy that started with a desire for natural birth and ended in C-section and I was feeling very discouraged, but researching birth helped me to feel like I understood what was going to happen and while I wouldn't ultimately be able to control the outcome, I could at least be informed about my choices. Some of what I read was empowering and I even looked forward to giving birth, although let's be honest, mostly because giving birth meant I would no longer be pregnant, glory hallelujah.

As the weeks ticked by, I hoped I would go into labor naturally. I started having contractions (very minor ones) a couple weeks before my due date, December 24th, which was very encouraging. I even enjoyed the contractions when they came- they mostly just felt like a warm sensation in my back. They started coming at regular intervals a few days after my due date, and I was so excited, I sat at my desk at work and wrote down the times of each one, about 7-9 minutes apart. They went away and returned a few times over the next few days and they got stronger. I felt buoyant at the signs I would really go into labor on my own. And by buoyant, I mean I was so miserable, huge, exhausted, uncomfortable and desperate to get.this.baby.out of me that just the hint that the end was near was all I could grasp at to get me through.

My last day at work was Friday December 28th, 4 days past my due date, and I knew it would be the last. I was having strong contractions all day and knew there was no way I would be returning on January 2nd, the next workday. I could tell my body was finally getting ready. It was nearly go time. I barely managed to waddle out to my car in the snow with all my stuff at the end of the day, ready for my 12 weeks off.

The next day I was at a friend's house catching up with some girlfriends when my water broke around 3 pm. "Well you guys I'm pretty sure my water just broke.  ...Yep. It definitely did.  I guess I better head home soon."

I planned to wait at home as long as possible before going into the hospital where the timer would start (t minus 24 hours until they would take the baby) so we settled in for an evening at home managing contractions, which quickly got stronger and stronger with the water broken. They went from a warm sensation to a feeling of pressure in my back to an incredibly intense pressure unlike anything else I have felt. Labor pain isn't pain like being cut or wounded, but rather, for me at least, it was a really strong pressure.  The only word that really describes it for me is intense. The pressure builds to such an intensity that it's hardly bearable.

I sat on a beach towel on the couch (anything less was inadequate for the "water" which continued to break) watching TV and wondering if I would make it without an epidural. I have absolutely no idea what was on TV. It was getting seriously intense and I seriously doubted my resolve to go natural. Finally we called the doctor to let him know I was in labor and we should probably come in. I packed my bag and around 11 pm we went out to the car.

It wasn't a fun car ride, trying to breathe through contractions and hanging on tightly to the car, hitting what felt like epic potholes and bumps, but we only live about 10 minutes from the hospital and at 11 pm traffic was light. 

It was late Saturday night, two nights before New Year's Eve, and the labor and delivery floor was a ghost town. I felt like I had the place to myself. The very kind nurses who checked me in and gave me a hospital gown coached me to breathe through my contractions and were very supportive of my wish to have a natural birth. I was so reassured by their presence. At check-in they found I was 5 centimeters dilated and the doctor said he expected we'd have a baby on our hands early in the morning, in 5 or 6 hours. Music to my ears.

We settled into our room and attempted to rest, if not sleep, through the night. I nodded off briefly between contractions and tried my hardest to relax and breathe through them. Finally, finally morning came, and I had made it to 8-9 cm. 10 centimeters is the magic number when it's time to push the baby out. So close. Just wait to feel the urge to push, the doctor said. Ok. I'm ready.  It was around 8 am. Come on urge to push, let's do this!!!!! But I did not feel an urge to push.

I snacked on some nuts and granola and drank pregnancy tea. Being able to eat and drink is a lovely perk of natural birth, although I wasn't terribly hungry. And we tried everything I had read about to get labor going. We walked and walked around the halls. I stopped and leaned on the wall when a contraction came and Rich pushed on my lower back to counteract the pressure.

We had a lavender scented neck warmer that could be heated up in a microwave which I used on my back - counterpressure and heat were the only things that I found really helped.

I tried sitting on the exercise ball.

I paced around the room....and as the hours ticked by I started to panic. This was not good. Lunchtime was coming and we should have a baby by now. Why don't I have the urge to push? The nurses gave us the afternoon to keep trying to get things going but the 4 pm deadline loomed and I didn't have a good feeling about this.

Sure enough 4 and 5 pm came and went and the urge to push never did.  I cried. I had made it so far on the "natural" plan - no pitocin, no epidural - but I knew I would have to get hooked up to the IV and get pitocin to increase my contractions and try to reach 10 cm. The doctor said we have no choice at this point. I had been stalled at 9 cm for about 8 hours.

I had read enough labor books to know that a labor with pitocin is exponentially harder to endure than natural contractions.  I had been able to breathe through and manage mine.

But at 5 pm the pitocin drip started and within the hour I was out of my mind, unable to bear the unrelenting contractions. I couldn't breathe through them or sit still or fathom another minute. I whispered to Rich, "epidural."

They called the epidural guy, and luckily since the floor was so quiet he came quickly. This man was pure speed and professionalism. At 6, he set up his tools lightning fast and went to work. The nurse held my arms in her arms, pulling me forward to try and anchor me still so he could make his incision. I wasn't capable of holding myself still through the pain. I was hardly aware of him working behind me; I was too overwhelmed with contractions.

But then the amazing, amazing medicine worked its magic and the contractions stopped.  At least as far as I could tell. They continued just the same, but I could no longer feel them and I nearly passed out with relief. I rested for the next 2 hours in blissful epidural calm while the pitocin did its work.

And around 8 pm, the doctor returned and declared I was ready to push. He swung a huge mirror down from the ceiling so I could see... what I would be doing. I had heard about this mirror and thought I would decline using it. But the doctor didn't ask first, he just busted it out, and there I was, in stadium-style lighting. It was horrifying, but I have to admit it was helpful to see what I was working toward, so I'd use it again.

I didn't have enough feeling internally to do any real "pushing" with the epidural still in effect, but it was quickly wearing off. I was starting to feel contractions again, which at this point was helpful (and they were MUCH reduced from before). I crunched up and pushed from the top, pushing down on the top of my belly with my hands, and trying to squeeze the baby out from the top. This actually worked shockingly well.

After 10 minutes and several rounds of focused pushing during contractions, there she was. First her head, then her shoulders. My baby girl. The doctor hooked his fingers under her armpits and pulled her out, with her squishy face and all her black hair. I have never felt such a tremendous physical relief as the moment she was born. It was hard to believe she was only 7 pounds because I felt a hundred pounds lighter as all the pressure released from my pelvis.

The epidural was mostly worn off and I had sensation back by then. The moments after she was born were a blur. I saw the placenta make its exit and asked the nurses to please aim the mirror somewhere else, I was all set with that view.

They gave her to me to hold and I was so overwhelmed with emotions and relief and physical feelings and crying and happy. I'm your mama! You are my baby! I'm somebody's mama now, and my baby is here, breathing her first breaths, alive for the first moments.  I couldn't even comprehend all that at the time, I was just trying to catch my breath. I was physically and emotionally exhausted from the 30 hours of labor since my water broke, long long ago, yesterday afternoon.  But so happy. We did it. She's here!

One of my favorite moments was seeing Rich holding her for the first time and falling in love with her. He glowed and it was so beautiful. He'd seen her on the ultrasound before but this was real, for the first time, he was really a dad now and holding his baby girl in his arms. I loved them both so much and I was proud of myself for bringing her into the world.

Every mom should be proud of her journey, whatever it holds. At home or in a hospital, labor induced or begun on its own, with or without medical interventions, chosen or not chosen. We all have our own paths to motherhood and each is unique and beautiful in its own way. My journey didn't go exactly the way I hoped but sometimes the failures make it even more beautiful.

I don't know if anyone will get anything useful from my story but I think all women should feel free to share their birth experiences. I can't even imagine being a mom without leaning on my own mom, my friends and other moms for advice and support, and I hope they know they can lean on me too.  We're all in this together and learning from each other. 

And I think that's all I have for now. Thanks for reading and have a beautiful day!

The best salad

A lot of people have a go-to recipe for when they need to bring a dish to something. Mine is this salad. The credit for introducing me to this salad goes to my stepmother-in-law Susan who served it at Christmas one year. Someone else introduced it to her, so I'm not sure who originated it, otherwise I would credit them heartily. I've been making this salad as often as possible, especially for everyday dinners at home, ever since Susan shared the recipe. It's just so good, I can't bring myself to make any other kind of salad beyond minor variations on this one. Favorite minor variation: add fresh chopped strawberries.

I've served it at a number of functions and I always get asked for the recipe. It's pretty much a guaranteed home run unless someone is allergic to walnuts or doesn't eat cheese. Candied pecans (or any other nuts) are a great substitute and you could also serve it without cheese for vegan or lactose intolerant friends. (Of course you would also have to substitute oil for the butter on the walnuts to be vegan.) Although, come to think of it, I don't personally know anyone who is completely vegan (that I'm aware of) so I have never tried that variation.  A life without butter or cheese... ok we're getting a little off topic here.

Back to The Salad. The secret is, of course, the homemade sweet-and-tangy vinaigrette dressing. It's so good I want to just dip anything in it after the lettuce is gone. Vegetables, potatoes, fish... I don't eat chicken but I have also heard it makes an awesome marinade for chicken. Here is the official recipe:

Glazed Walnut Salad
 
1 cup chopped walnuts
3 T butter
¼ cup sugar
¼ tsp salt
½ to 1 tsp pepper
Large amount of salad greens
¾ cup dried cranberries
4 oz. feta cheese
 
For the dressing:
¼ cup vinegar (any type)
½ cup chopped parsley
¼ cup red onion/shallot, chopped
2 cloves garlic
1/3 cup sugar
½ cup oil
½ tsp. oregano
Salt & pepper to taste
 
Melt butter in a skillet; add sugar, walnuts, salt and pepper.  

Cook on medium for 5 minutes.  Cool on wax paper.
 
For the dressing: Combine all ingredients in 

blender or food processor until well mixed.
 
In a large bowl, layer salad greens, feta cheese, 

cranberries and walnuts.  

Add dressing before serving and mix well.

 

 The homemade candied walnuts really take this over the top.  I started making those by themselves for Christmas every year because they were such a hit.  I will admit, though, that in a time crunch I just buy the candied walnuts from the grocery store and skip that part. It is easy, and worth it, to candy them yourself, but it gets a pan dirty, and well sometimes we're just a little crunched for time and we take shortcuts. 

The dressing is very flexible. I've made it many ways - with balsamic vinegar, rice vinegar, or red wine vinegar.  Basil or parsley. Red onion or shallot (or neither if I have neither on hand). I stopped measuring long ago and I just eyeball the amounts of everything and I am yet to screw it up too terribly.  As long as it's about 2 parts oil to 1 part vinegar, you get some sugar in there, and pack it as full of the fresh herbs as possible, you are not going to go too wrong. 

 

Once again, I love my Cuisinart hand blender so much for making the dressing - just make it in the container you'll be storing it in, no transferring. An old glass pickle jar is perfect with a wide enough mouth for the blender, and you don't have to chop the parsley much at all, just small enough pieces so they will blend. 

One key tip, which you already know if you've ever served a dressed salad before, is add the dressing right before serving - not too far ahead. It will get soggy and sad. The best is when I have time to make the dressing and serve the salad all at once - oh my yum, it's so fresh and amazing. I often have to make the dressing the day before which is slightly less amazing but still works. 

 

It will keep for about a week or so once it's made and I try to maximize my greens intake whenever I have some left over and just keep scarfing mass amounts of this salad until the dressing is gone. If you are looking to get more greens in your diet this will do the trick I promise!  It's not a "light" dressing or salad by any means but it is so, so delicious and it is great real food. 

Nutrition tip of the day: an oil based dressing (or any fat) helps your body absorb the fat soluble nutrients in the salad greens, so pour on the dressing and enjoy!

An Ode to the Microwave

I'm a little low on inspired topics today, so I am devoting today's blog to the wonderful modern convenience that lives above my stove. I have a gas stove and I hate it.

Short side rant about my gas stove/oven. I know everyone loves gas stoves... they cook so great, blah blah blah. It's true that the stovetop burners fire up instantly, but the oven takes FOREVER to preheat, and I *hate* cleaning that filthy bastard stovetop. The burner grates are an absolute bitch to get clean, even scrubbing with steel wool and soaking... NOT worth the hours of blood sweat and tears. Ain't nobody got time fo DAT.

my archnemesis.

Okay enough negativity, let's talk about the microwave!  A frequently underappreciated piece of scientific achievement.

I don't want to say that time is not at a premium for people who don't have kids, but becoming a mom seems to make every second that much more precious. While I used to love spending time making elaborate and delicious meals, and on special occasions I still do, most often I just don't have the time and energy to spend.  For that reason, the microwave is easily my favorite appliance. It's not just for reheating leftovers!! There are so many things you can make fresh in the microwave so much faster than in an oven or on a stove!

Who knew that you can bake potatoes in the microwave? Just poke holes in it with a fork, give it 8 minutes and you have a whole russet potato (or sweet potato) all ready to go. You can cook fish in the microwave in just a couple minutes (covered, since it tends to explode.) The best part about cooking in the microwave, besides the time savings, is you have no pots or pans to clean!  Which is even more time saved. And priceless for me since I HATE washing dishes. If I can't load it into the dishwasher, forget it. (Ok.... I really do love my dishwasher.... it could face off with the microwave for favorite appliance.)

Some of my go-to microwave items:

• hot water, to which I sometimes add lemon, lemon and cayenne pepper, or lemon, honey, vinegar and cinnamon for a sore throat. no kettle needed!
• fish fillets (usually salmon in our house)
• whole potatoes
• steamed vegetables (peas, broccoli, butternut squash.) I do admit that most vegetables are best roasted with olive oil, but in a time crunch or to go in a recipe, microwave steaming is clutch. I steam frozen peas for my one-year-old, add a little olive oil and salt and she loves them.
• "scrambled" eggs. It's true that they aren't as good as real scrambled eggs, but if you really don't want to wash a pan, you would be surprised by how good they can be.  The key is frequent stirring, every 10 (or even fewer) seconds to prevent them from getting too rubbery.
• oatmeal. no hot breakfast is faster.

Also, if you're looking for a fun activity on a rainy day, marshmallows are fun to microwave.  You can watch them inflate to HUGE proportions!!! Pure entertainment.

I won't even get into all the things you can just heat up for a quick meal like beans and cheese and frozen dinners. I really feel the microwave makes my life so much better. The number one rule is don't microwave anything plastic.  No plastic wrap or plastic containers; always microwave in glass or on safe ceramic dishes. Some plastic says it is microwave safe, but I try to err on the side of NO plastic in the microwave. I prefer to risk as few nasty chemicals in my food as possible.

There is some controversy about whether radiation from a microwave oven can be harmful, but it is non-ionizing radiation and no studies have shown any cause for concern with normal use (versus a microwave that's rigged to work with the door open or some other such craziness).

So, I am forging ahead with my love of the microwave, because the most precious thing I have is TIME and this awesome technology lets me make the most of it! Thank you to Percy Spencer for accidentally discovering the specific heating effect of a high-power microwave beam in 1945, and engineers everywhere for inventing new technologies that improve our lives every day, because lord knows I'm not doing it.

In closing, I give you a haiku:

the food's almost done
better hurry and press clear
before I hear beeps!!!

Soup Swap!

This week we've had the coldest weather Cincinnati has seen in 20 years! The real temperature got down to -6 and with the wind chill it felt like -30! I am so relieved it's going to get a little warmer tomorrow. I have to wear my Cold Avenger mask to and from work when it's this cold and it can be a little embarrassing to walk around looking like Darth Vader. But still vastly preferred to freezing my face off.

Obviously all I want to eat when it's brutally, bitterly cold and windy outside is some hot, steaming SOUP. Yum. My coworker, former college roommate and now bff 4-life Sarah suggested the brilliant idea of a soup swap and I screamed YES! at the top of my lungs.  Ok, we work in an office, I didn't really do that. But inside I did! Because a soup swap is pretty much the best idea ever, especially when you are swapping with Sarah, who is truly a legendary soup chef.

Here's the idea: we each make large batches of 2 or 3 soups, and we bring in half of them for each other! So simple yet so, so ingenious. If you love soup, find a coworker, friend, or neighbor who also loves soup and you are in business. Since I eat a pesco-vegetarian diet, Sarah was kind enough to modify her recipes to make them vegetarian (mostly by using vegetable broth rather than chicken) so we could both enjoy all 5 soups. Yes, 5 - I made 2 and she made 3! Overachiever!  So here are the 5 delicious soups we are enjoying this week:

• First I made my favorite, April Bloomfield's Chickpea-and-Rosemary Soup which I originally found in the September 2005 issue of O magazine and have made approximately a thousand times since then. With vegetable rather than chicken broth, of course. This might be my favorite recipe for anything ever. It's so easy, so delicious and so healthy, the golden trinity of recipes. I like to describe it as similar to hummus soup. If you like hummus, and rosemary, do not delay and make yourself a batch. I was lucky enough to have some fresh rosemary from my grandmother's garden left over from our visit at the end of November to add, although I cut corners on the garlic and just used the powdered kind. The one thing, in my opinion, NOT to skimp on is the lemon juice.  Squeeze a real lemon! Don't buy the bottled lemon juice!  Seriously, ugh, it is not even close to the same.

• Next I made a butternut squash-apple soup. I used Ina Garten's recipe as my main reference but also deviated from it somewhat since I didn't have any apple juice, cider or curry powder on hand. For the seasoning I used some turmeric and nutmeg instead. And I used broth and water instead of the juice. There are 4 chopped apples in it so it is plenty sweet! It took forever to chop up 4 apples and 3 onions so I will definitely look for pre-chopped onions next time. Such a time saver!! Plus less crying in the kitchen. When I wore contacts, I never cried chopping onions, but ever since I got Lasik it's a different story. 

The huge time saver I did take advantage of was a big bag of pre-chopped butternut squash from Trader Joe's. I chopped up a whole butternut squash once and I won't be doing that again! 

One other thing I love: my Cuisinart immersion blender for pureed soups. I can't sing the praises of this thing enough. It's so super easy to puree soups and a breeze to clean up. No transferring to a blender or processor - we don't even own a blender since ours broke a couple years ago and I haven't missed it!  I just stick the immersion blender into anything I would blend and my god, it's so much less mess. It also has a mini food processor attachment which I love for things like pesto. Ok, Cuisinart should really start paying me at this point, I'll move on.

Sarah made 3 Rachael Ray soup recipes: black bean, farmer's market veggie and pumpkin, cheddar and chipotle. She modified the black bean a lot to remove the chorizo and add rice and it was super delicious.  Definitely a great black bean soup base reference. The farmer's market veggie comes with a side of pureed herbs in oil and that soup is AWESOME as well, so good. I haven't tried the pumpkin one yet but it also sounds amazing and I can't wait - I am soo spoiled with a fantastic variety of soups this week, I can barely contain myself. Soup swap for the win!

Puerto Rico December 7-14 Part 2 Cabo Rojo

The most relaxing, beach- and pool-centric portion of our trip was the last 3 days, in Cabo Rojo. This whole region had a really wonderful and secluded atmosphere to enjoy some honeymoon-style R&R.  A highlight for us was the awesome view from our condo, where we got to just sit and drink mimosas to start the day.

The key word here is secluded. No one goes to Cabo Rojo for vacation, as least as far as I could tell.  We did not see other tourists around anywhere, and it was honestly a little sad at some points, that we were the only two people in really beautiful settings, enjoying secluded dinners, secluded beaches... it was amazing, but also, it makes me want to get the word out about Cabo Rojo! Why aren't more people vacationing here!?!?  I want the nice restaurants to stay in business!!

We enjoyed lovely dinners at

• Tino's Restaurant, where our waiter was as kind and sweet a middle aged waiter as you've ever met. His English was many magnitudes better than our Spanish, but still he made the most endearing effort to communicate and also quickly correct my meal when the kitchen made the wrong thing by mistake. This was clearly a local place, serving Puerto Rican food and frequented by locals; the only other two tables while we were there were large local families. It's nothing fancy, but fabulous service and authentic food.
• Agua al Cuello at the Parador Bahia Salinas Beach Hotel, on our way back from Playa Sucia. We were the only people here, and the best thing about this place is the ambiance. Really beautiful resort setting on the water.... just lovely. I could not fathom the absolute lack of people at this resort and the restaurant!  Where was everyone?!?!  The food was good, we got a huge salad with mango and almonds, some ceviche and a fried appetizer, as well as some festive and affordable Bahia Sunsets to drink.
  

• Miski Mikuna, which is Peruvian cuisine, and the chef will knock your socks off by coming to your table, explaining what the specials are that night, and customizing your dinner to you. I was SO excited to come here after reading the TripAdvisor reviews and it wasn't fancy like I thought it might be, but the food was definitely the focus. Unfortunately, we had eaten a late lunch that day and didn't have tons of room for feasting, or else we definitely would have tried more courses. As it was, we enjoyed a salmon appetizer, and DELICIOUS passionfruit cheesecake and key lime pie for dessert (the key lime pie!!!! WOW maybe the best I've ever had) -- and... drumroll... our most adventurous food of the trip, the whole red snapper (head included) which was that day's special.
  
  
  
  
  
  
   
  
  
  We saw the snapper come out to the table next to us and got nervous.... should we have ordered that??? But it was actually delicious and I was proud of us for trying it. It came with tasty leeks and carrots in cream sauce. And I mean, it WAS deep fried, so there really wasn't much chance it wouldn't be delicious, with or without the head and tail.
  
  
  The only "activity" we really did in Cabo Rojo, other than stopping by Walgreens and the grocery, was a day spent at Playa Sucia. It was the most glorious, fantastic day and we did not want to leave.  We had a perfect shady spot under a tree with our beach chairs, books and towels and very few other people around.  The only mistake was not bringing food and drinks (and bug repellent). I may have come away with bites all over my back. Bummer. But totally worth it. Around lunchtime we started getting faintly hungry. Rich said, should we go? I said, maybe another 20 minutes.  2 and a half hours later we finally reluctantly decided we had to leave and get food.  It was absolutely beautiful and zen and one of those days I wish I could relive over and over. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  It was a bit challenging to find since it's pretty remote and the trip was rough on the rental car but definitely WORTH it. I'm so glad I got to spend a perfect afternoon in this heavenly spot. I'll always remember it. 
  
  
  I can't recommend enough to anyone going to Puerto Rico to get away from San Juan (as much fun as it is!) and get over to Cabo Rojo for at least a day or two. If you want secluded, this is your place. Not to mention the weather is reliably spectacular. It's more arid than San Juan and the rainier east side of the island; high of 88 and sunny most every day. I would even compare it to Hawaii as a perfect tropical weather location. We had such a lovely time here. Sadly, all good vacations have to come to an end. Bye Cabo Rojo!